So you know how you have a ton of lobster farming, ivory carving, and fire-ballering that  you need to get done? And yet you can’t get yourself to do even the most basic task? Did you know that makes you an awful human being?

No wait. It makes you depressed. Which sucks and all, but is still a more sensible explanation for why it’s so difficult to do things that seem really straightforward. Yeah yeah, you’ve got important things that you’re letting slide. Who the fuck doesn’t? There are plenty of non-depressed people who ignore their responsibilities just because they are being assholes, so you’re in good company. Or not so good company as the case may be.

Now, you may still be an asshole, but you’re not one of those assholes. How do you know? Um. All the fucking guilt. If you feel like shit for not fulfilling your responsibilities, then you’re not a dick, you’re a depressed dick. And if you’re a depressed dick, then even if you want to set everything straight, it’s really fucking hard because you’re all miserable and shit.

Straight fact: you may not be able to do everything that you need to do right away. And this is an issue, because these are the things that you neeeeed to do. In which case, this is a definite, ask-for-help situation. If you can’t do something, then you can’t and that’s just how it is. It’s cool though, because unless you’re dead, there are still some things you can do. Like breathing! Or eating! Or sleeping! So many fun options are open to you. Maybe you need help to do even these types of things. Whatever. The only thing that matters is that they get done.

After you’ve mastered these exciting techniques, you may find that you can do other things too. Like speak words, or move body parts. Then you may be able to accomplish basic life functions and really, meeting even a minimal level of functionality is pretty cool. Sometimes you can even do quite well at things because you’ve found ways of managing your shit. And if so, it’s okay to feel accomplished by the things you do, no matter how basic they are. Especially because if you don’t give  yourself any credit, then your feelings of un-productivity just become fodder that your guilt can munch on.

So do anything that you can get yourself to do. It’s not about getting to everything right away. That may take time. Your baseline is doing absolutely nothing at all, so whatever you can get yourself to do is a good head start.