So you know how sometimes you really want some help with something? Like moving, or painting a mural, or collecting silk cocoons? And yet you don’t ask anyone because it makes you feel all weird inside or you wouldn’t want to impose on people or you think you’ll look weak or something something something? That shit is dumb. Just fucking ask.

If people close to you say no when you ask for help, then they’re being a fucking asshole. Because asking for help is really fucking hard to do, and they’ve probably had to do it at some point, so they should know how much it sucks. Even if you have asked for a thousand things in the past, and some have worked out while others haven’t, it doesn’t fucking matter. If you really need help, then you need it. If someone says no when you really need help and honestly ask for it, then that’s not on you. It’s on them.

Unless you’re asking for help with something that both you and they know is fucking bullshit. Stuff like hiding something that you need to take responsibility for, or enabling some shitty behavior that both of you think you need to stop. If someone refuses to help you with something stupid, that’s a good sign that they actually give a fuck about you. In that case, they’ll probably be willing to help you do something that will actually be productive. And if you want to avoid possible judgment or resentment or negative history, it’s also cool to seek help from people who aren’t close to you. You can seek out individuals who get what you’re going through, or who just know how to help.

Now even if people are willing to help you, you still may not want to ask. It will make you weak. It will be embarrassing. It feels uncomfortable. You don’t know how to do it. Fuck that. If you want help, then who the fuck cares about how you ask or how you look when you do it? If asking for help is weak, then why is it so fucking hard to do? It takes a fuck ton of effort and inner turmoil before you can just speak some goddamned words.

And that’s all really besides the point. Because if you need help, it’s because you need fucking help. What is necessary must be done no matter what. Save the embarrassment or guilt for after you’ve cauterized the wound and stopped hemorrhaging internally. And even if people help you, it’s not like they can do everything for you. You’ll still have to help yourself, and will still have to deal with the consequences of whatever is going on.

So if you don’t want help, then don’t ask for it. Shocker. And if you do want help, then fuck, do ask for it. Not asking for help while you slowly die inside is fucking pointless. You don’t get help, you do get misery. Oh and you do get to keep thinking that you’re an independent asshole who doesn’t need nothing from no one.  Guess that can be worth it, if that’s your thing. Whatever. It’s cool to do what’s necessary rather than wait around for things to just happen on their own. Asking for help sucks. Getting help and then moving on with your life? That sucks a lot less.